What is Your Mood Today?

^ *huuuuuuuuuuuuuugs*

Just tired generally, and this coffee ain't working yet.

A little excited. A job I applied for last night emailed me this morning, asking me to answer some follow-up essay questions as part of the interview process. Granted, that's probably a formality that everyone has to go through, so I should stop being so optimistic. But anyway, I also require coffee...

^ Shush, you're allowed to be optimistic if you want to be. Better than talking yourself down all day. You can do it!

I am full of teh angstxieties about life but am attempting to work through the panic and find the roots to my problems.

^ *hugs*

Kind of sluggish and depressed. I think it's the time of year when I just want to say frick it all and hibernate.

Full of jitters as always. I wish I could just not be so nervous about the simplest of things. Just self-conscious about what people will think of a rather sincere thing I wrote on another forum, but I'll try not to think of it. Need to get past that so I can make more of a presence on that place and maybe even make more friends. Damn my neurosis. It prevents me from making more friends!

Still processing the fact that I woke up at 1 PM today and I still have a crapload of stuff to get done. Who ever let me be an adult? :/

honestly im usually really depressed i hate my life. i need to get a new one &

save myself from this torture. cuz it really feels like that. today im alright ive had last 3 days of high severe stress. so today i suppose 'alright' is the mood.

Happy today. The husbando and I are friends with a couple who I was worried was starting to feel superior to us because they're very religious college graduates and we're not, but I was out having lunch with his wife and apparently he super-respects me, which is a relief after feeling looked down on.

^ That is awesome! :3

I'm less depressed than I was over the weekend, but still kind of bleh and I just want to sleep all the time and not do things I need to get done. ._. Self, I am disappoint.

i am miserable.

Financially anxious? Well, more like anxious about everything but with top notes of economic desperation and an undertone of low self-worth and yes I am describing my anxiety like a connoisseur please stun me with a brick.

*bricks thrown*

im usually very hurt or angery or depressed or all at once that.

I feel kinda low-key crap today.  Dunno why. :P

I'll say I was in a really sh*tty mood today, but not in any type of mood I could just get angry or sad about. More of my usual... kinda murky grey everything sucks and I just want to go to sleep for a month type of feeling.
Really feeling like I'm losing passion in life, maybe just havent found my niche in work or the social machine idk.

Sororicide wrote:I'll say I was in a really sh*tty mood today, but not in any type of mood I could just get angry or sad about. More of my usual... kinda murky grey everything sucks and I just want to go to sleep for a month type of feeling.
Really feeling like I'm losing passion in life, maybe just havent found my niche in work or the social machine idk.

Yeah, I feel the same way right now. .___. Just kind of lowkey depressed and bluh. I should be doing things but everything feels overwhelming and too much.

i usually feel like crap depressed or angery cuz ppl do shitty things to me or whatever. also hurt. this week ive been really nervous taking a test & somewhat scared trying to study for it. fear of failure i think. so i study my ass off race down to take the test between my nerves & hurry up to get there i was stressed as hell over it. so i failed the fucker. i took it pretty hard honestly. and i still have to pass it so i still need to study my ass off. and im still feeling the stress of it & nervous over it. been trying to forget about the stupid thing. then i start thinking about everything else i try to do thats not going well. im starting to think im either a really stupid person or retarded or have unknown learning disabillity of some kind. i faild seriously important test, my rip workout not going well cuz i dont have wat i need to acheive it, my instrument playing/learning not going well cuz i dont know enough & i dont have wat i need to get anywhere with it. i bought a tuner but it sounds crappy to my ears so i dont know if im tuned too high or too low??? doing it by ear no tuner i tune to sound between where the tuner is telling me to do it. it just sounds wierd. i still cant find a damn job crap economy. i need food in the house & i need clothes cuz i finally lost enough weight im starting to run out of clothes that fit everythings too big to wear now. so thrift store in near future. i dunno why i cant get ahead with anything. maybe my iq is stupid or something? but ive never had this much crap happen at once. so i dunno maybe somehow i got stupid.

Kinda lousy. I think I either have a cold or ALLERGY HELL. Also my work hours are kind of a drag.

yeah everybodys got a normal life except me. im pissed as hell at it.

Not sure if sick. .__.

Guess I'll join you in the "not feeling too well" group.
I can't sleep without pills since early July and I feel really unwell. I'm unsure what to do and I've lost the sense of time like whoa (probably because I don't know how to sleep good anymore... even when my insomnia gets better, I never manage to get to sleep at normal hours... as if it was a painful thing for me to do *when really, it's "not sleeping" that actually hurts me*... I know there are some people with anxiety who feel also like me... we push away sleep for many reasons : fear that we won't be able to sleep at all, fear that we will think of bad depressing stuff before sleep comes, not wanting to wake up to the next day, or feeling like we failed to do what we wanted to do during the day... hence feeling like sleeping would be a waste a time... also the fact that during the night, you feel a certain peace and quiet you don't feel during the day).

And then, there is my family expecting too much of me all of once, my mother stressing about time, my dad being pushy and mean/judgemental sometimes (not to mention how much we fight over things I wish we didn't need to argue about... like feminism and being acceptive of gay/trans people *he pretty much accuses me of being the sexist one when he is the one who says he's against women in sports because "they don't look pretty enough for his taste"... sometimes, I wonder if he says stuff like this just to piss me off or if he really believes in the offensive stuff that come out of his mouth at times... I wonder sometimes how he would react if either me or my sister discovered that we were gay/bi... considering he can't look at gay people on tv without saying crappy stuff and fleeing the room*), the feeling like I don't exist in the house (during vacations, I spent time with my mom and dad in a smaller house and it made my problem more apparent... I shouldn't live with them anymore, it's not good for me... except for material reasons)...

But oh well, I can't leave without money. So I need a job. And to get a job, I need good motivation and self-esteem. I also need to learn how to keep friends instead of not letting people in or letting them go when we stop taking the same classes (but how do I do this now that highschool is over and I can't afford higher classes anymore... I can't form lasting bonds with people I only see 3 hours a week at best... geez, bonding over fandom on the internet is the only way I manage to socialize regularly). So basically, I need to contact my two psy again and resume my therapy (I stopped because I felt insecure and down *feeling like they wouldn't be able to help more... sometimes, I felt miserable after seeing my psy/coatch... guess I'm not the easiest patient she had* and then the horrible Paris terrorist shootings happened and it paralysed me... I tried to tell myself I could do things on my own later on... and there are things I could do on my own *I was really surprised during my vacations when I was able to say "hello" first to random people in the streets, or when I brought back a toddler who was running towards the road to his mom... it felt good*... but apparently, I still need a therapist and meds... even if I wish I could avoid the latter).

casual

@RadicalDreamer *hugs* I'm so sorry you feel like that, and I hope you can find help for it! Also hope your general situation gets better. <3 Depression/anxiety sucks in general, and being in an unsupportive environment can make it even worse, I think.

I kind of get the losing track of time thing too, although in my case it's because I sleep too much (esp. during the day) and still don't have the energy to do anything, and then I feel worse about myself and just want to go back to sleep because what's the use. .__. But like, with my wacky sleep schedule I've been having really vivid dreams and then getting them mixed up with reality so I feel like I'm really losing my marbles. D:

At the moment I just feel tired and moderately uncomfortable, tho.

sluggish. rather tired. i regret drinking the high calorie & high sugar energy drink. retarded family never listens. i have to workout twice as hard so it wont get stored as fat, which means im not burning off stred fat, only what i drank. this is so retarded.

I'm feeling worse. To the point a doctor called an ambulance, as he didn't know what the heck was going on with my heart. Turns out the people at the hospital had no clue either. So they sent me home and told me to see a cardiologist to be sure and go see my psy again, as well as maybe try relaxing techniques. What I suspect is that I was way too sleep deprived, and this combined with my periods and the fact i stopped the anxiety meds because i was scared of getting addicted ... well, it messed with my entire body big time. It was absolutely horrible, horrible enough to make you think of death as the sweetest release from such a living nighmare. I was feeling things like these : burning sensations from the inside, stomach pain, fast pulse (but when the first doctor looked at me the day after i had to take the anxiety med again * because i was trembling and could'nt get up... i was extremely weak and barely ate because of this* he told me my pulse was slow and there was something strange about my heart), trembling, feeling detached from my body...

Now, i feel a bit better but i'm still worried. I can sleep again without any meds again after 2 months (but i can wake up in the middle of the night, because i feel too nervous or because of nightmares *one of them is episodic and is about me having killed someone and trying to escape... horrible dream... my dad thinks it means i'm destroying myself and have issues facing and dealing with it*)... but I don't feel exactly well. I still feel something irritating in my throat (sometimes, i just feel a weight, other times, the irritation reaches my ears... and there is a disgusting taste... it might be a stomach issue, possibly triggered by extreme stress/nervous fatigue), i'm tired, nervous, nauseous, tingly... and when i don't feel those things anymore, the detachment sensation comes back and scares the hell out of me (seriously, it's just freaky and i get clingy or aggressive in order to feel like i'm still there and living).

I needed to express this somewhere. I think i need to stay away from tv and computer screens because they're not too good for me right now (which is annoying considering how much i need the internet to communicate, for art *research and posting artworks*, to keep in touch with job agencies *i'm probably in trouble considering i missed an appointment mail while i felt sick*), but it bothers me to think something could happen to me and internet friends would be left in the dark.

I hope i'll get better and change my life for the better... for good.

depressed. i wish life was more. i really need a life desperately.