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    mid life crisis

    Shizukesa
    Shizukesa


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    Post by Shizukesa Sat May 16, 2015 6:18 pm

    ok so i may or may not be having one of these. what actually counts as mid life crisis? and feel free to discuss yours too if you feel better saying about it. Very Happy
    stitchedmoon
    stitchedmoon


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    Post by stitchedmoon Sun May 17, 2015 7:37 am

    Welp, depending on your age (like if you're in or around your twenties) it might be more of a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quarter-life_crisis, but I get that feeling. (By comparison here's the wiki page for http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Midlife_crisis, in case you wanted to read up on it.)

    Personally speaking, I've been feeling old and burned out to various degrees since my senior year in high school, but now that I'll be 30 this year, I'm (apologies to Shulk) really feeling it. :B I dunno, it's partly superficial stuff like being a dinosaur on tumblr, and youth culture in general seeming even more obscure and incomprehensible than when I was in that demographic, and partly the realization that, holy crap, I'm the same age my parents were when they owned a house and had kids and steady jobs and I'm an incompetent bag of potatoes that can't adult. (That also might be a generational thing, because apparently #ThisGeneration is all about getting screwed over by late capitalism or whatever.) I simultaneously feel like a senior citizen and a two-year-old with insurmountable student loan debt. And I mean, my ex-dad and ex-stepmom always used to say my 30s would be better and more stable than my 20s, but they also said college was better than high school and high school was better than ... y'know what, I think they were just full of crap.
    Shizukesa
    Shizukesa


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    mid life crisis Empty Re: mid life crisis

    Post by Shizukesa Sun May 17, 2015 8:24 pm

    honestly most ppl are full of crap. all because someone says stuff is great or stuff is crap doesnt make it so.

    my issues im in my 30s, of course povery sucks terribly. theres a million other problems that relate. the one i feel is most painful it might sound wierd or lame or i dunno stupid maybe. i have no one i can tell these things to cuz no one i know will listen to what i feel is important. thats another problem. but i sometimes feel i really need to say & be understood cuz i really need to say things i cant say & i know i cant cuz of the behaviour i get from ppl i cant tell them cuz of what they will act like. so i die inside & dont say. so ive got a bazillion issues a bazillion problems that seem to create a bazillion more problems & im not sure how much more of this i can take. so its leading me to think i can & should have a better life. its not fair i dont have a good life. my life is total shit & sucks horribly. i have become really depressed, hurt & angery. i never used to feel this bad all the time or near all the time. so i really try to focus on what little good i have that still has a problem attatched to it. so im not sure if im having a midlife crisis or not but whatever its defined as or not its deffinately terrible. so i love to workout. im fat & ugly as hell. i know i am. im a wast size 44. i look like shit. my hair has pigment loss its got white strands in it since i was still early 20s. i have tons of abdomanal fat. i see these guys that look like thor or chris evans these really hot good looking men with muscles. its hot. i really want it, & by 'it' i mean my own man that looks that good which i dont have. ive never dated. im in my 30s & ive never dated. i should give up & become a nun. i hate life. theres too much shit to have a good & happy life with someone & i know why i want someone is because ppl in love have good happy lives because their in love. so ive been reading alot about how to rip & look like 'it' maybe somebody find me really hot insted of sitting here feeling like life such a shitty thing & drowning in my agony of it. yeah im emotionally a mess from how life is now. it doesnt seem to be stopping or changing either so as far as i know this crap wil keep causeing a bazillion problems. i want freed of this. i want happy good normal life i have always deserved. so it gets painful thinking all this & not loving someone. so i read all this workout stuff & it says how to grow muscle mass & now i know so much im like a workout expert lol. and thats great. but then all this shit interfears & i cant do it cuz of crap that happens. then i feel like worse shit. then i also feel i cant tell anything important i need to talk about to anyone i know so i feel worse like shit. i really need workingout & i really need talking, but if talkings not allowed for crap reasons then i at least at very least need to be doing what makes me feel good at least about something. so workingout is extremely important. so ive read how testosterone starts dropping in your 30s. so once you hit 30s both males & females start dropping. so its harder to gain muscle to look great & also 'intrest' yes that kind, dropps. im looking at myself with all this abdominal fat & they say you get ab fat worse when it does drop so im thinking my levels of that are low i have tons of belly fat, i dont feel 'intrest' like i did frequantly as a teen i just dont feel it at all & that could be my levels of that but it could also be cuz im so emotional too i think its both causeing it. im very obese & want to do something about it. so all my thoughts connect on that. im old, im fat, im ugly, ive never dated ive never loved & i have no choice but to live this crap life that keeps getting crappier & im not even allowed to say what i think & feel of things as & be taken seriously on it. does this count as midlife crisis or just my life is a crisis?

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